Valentine’s day, like many days which can be celebratory, are days which can be painful too depending on what memories emerge. There are all sorts of perspectives on loss and grief but I regularly revisit Bonhoeffer’s words from prison written on Christmas Eve 1943:
“It is nonsense to say that God fills the gap; he doesn’t fill it, but on the contrary, he keeps it empty and so helps us keep alive our former communion with each other, even at the cost of pain”.
This may not be the experience of everyone but perhaps helps to reassure us that others too find a void that God does not fill as we reflect on losses.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer. Letters and Papers from Prison. (London: SCM Press, 1971), p. 176